Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Learning To Fly

Yes, yes, yes I've been a very bad blogger. Actually, can I really still consider myself a blogger? Doesn't one have to blog to be a blogger. Yes, bad form indeed.

But moving on.

...or rather, catching up.

Have I ever mentioned I'm a bit on the spontaneous side? Impulsive even, perhaps. Well, I am. Recently, while I was to go visit the local grocery store, I was in a mental slump. It was a beautiful day and I had no good excuse to be so, well, slumpy. So I decided I needed a change in perspective.

This was the new vantage point I needed:

There's no sensation to compare with this
Suspended animation, a state of bliss

I stopped into my neighborhood airfield where a kindly, yet frightfully elderly, pilot risked his, mine and a few hundred earth-bound beings' lives to give me a crash, no...that's not right, let's say, a cliff notes version of a flying lesson. Fifteen minutes on the ground going over all the doohickeys and things that go ping. Then it was all 'contact', propeller spinning and before I knew it I was taxing down the runway.

Did you know that while on the ground, the little steering wheel thing does you no good? A few close calls off the runway and I finally understood that point.

And while thoughts of a certain DeLorian ran threw my head, we sped faster and faster down the runway and suddenly were airborne. Incredible. While Capt. Ancient shouted commands of the things I've only briefly learned about, and in my shear panic of actual flight, had now completely forgotten about, we dipped and weaved, and bumped our way into the clear blue sky. I may or may not have wet myself at this point. Honestly, I was sweating too much to be certain.

Since we had an hour to burn in the friendly skies, Mr. Wright asked me where I would like to go. I requested a fly over my farm. Thankfully he took the controls as I snapped pictures. I snapped pictures. very. slowly.

Eventually he insisted I take back the controls and we continued our flight. I flew west and circled around my Dad's house and finally turned back towards the airport. He went over all the steps to landing all the while my mind kept shouting over the sound of his voice, "you're freakin' crazy!!!!", so I missed most of the directions. Maybe I could just take some pictures as we land, no?

As we passed over the main road and I could actually see into people's car windows, I felt another surge of panic. He told me to idle down the engine, line up to the runway, BUT DON'T LOOK AT THE RUNWAY! because apparently, if you do, you're more likely to nose-dive into it. Oh good gawd! So with white knuckles, heart palpitations and a renewed will to live, I fixed my eyes past the runway...but only before I notice Amelia Earhart's Dad now sat next to me, slightly leaning back with his arms firmly crossed, like he was welcoming certain death. Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
I held back the urge to cry...or scream, and idled the engine to a near halt, tipped the nose up and...

Gently now, you just wanna kiss the ground, just a little peck, a smooch like you're kissing your sister.


And again, that steering wheel thing doesn't help once you're on the ground. Slow, eh?
But after a few quick detours off the tarmac, and back on again, I nervously guided the plane off the runway and to it's parking spot next to other expensive planes I could easily wipe out with one false move. The sound of cutting engine was the sweetest of all.

Another item off the bucket list. Check and mark!

But wait there's more...

Another item on my list; see The Wall live. And well, since the original tour was when I was 4 or 5 years old, that item seemed to have no hopes of being fulfilled without a time machine.

...until Roger Water announce a new tour earlier this year!

Pink Floyd The Wall has been my favorite film for the past 20 years. Call me crazy, call me morose, but I LOVE that film and album.

Well the concert, or rather theatrical performance did not disappoint! It was INCREDIBLE! Our seats were right on the floor, which of course was super cool!

I can't say I've attended many concerts that were this emotional. Roger Water's has tweaked the message a bit from his personal loss of his father to war, to how we all lose something to war; loved ones, freedom, humanity, innocence. On all sides.

08:45 was a super cool moment!

If the tour comes to your neighborhood, run like hell to see it.

hee, get it?

Roger Waters channels his inner Richard Gere;

Morgan channels her inner Bob Geldof.

Goodbye, blue sky


JJ said...

The flying sounds terrifying - good for you for striking that one off the ole' bucket list.

I am totally jealous of 1. your beautiful farm and 2. the concert/show - I too love PF :). Glad you had a good time!

Frank Irwin said...

Taking off is pretty easy, but landing on the first flight? Awesome!

Bev said...

Great post, Malomatic! So glad you didn't crash and die while Old Man Earhart caught a quick nap. :)

Welcome back to BlogLand, population YOU!

Mala said...

JJ - I won't lie, it was terrifying. In other news, I sweated off 15lbs in one hour. yay.

Frank - See, I think landing would be easy.... you could always crash.

Bev - It's good to be back in bloggarooville. I have all intentions of sticking around for a while. really.

MtnMama said...

Wow. I knew you were awesome and fabulous, but I had no idea you were also so ballsy and skillful! You rock, my dear!
And your farm, is of course, the stuff of dreams.

Nice concert footage. Made me cry... I'm such the old hippie.

Lori said...

Seriously, you make John drool sometimes. If I didn't like you so much, I might be jealous! :)

He would laugh at me if I said I wanted to take flying lessons. Probably because he knows that in no way, shape or form am I brave enough to even contemplate that, but still...big props in his book.

(Like you need them after the blindfolded horses. Every time we pass our local farm on our way home, he looks for them and laughs...and tells me he's just thinking of that post of yours.)

Stuart said...

My God™, your awesomeness out-awesomed anything awesome I've ever experienced. Except that one thing, of course.

I am officially jealous, dawg. And thrilled for you.


I mean that in the sweetest way. [doe eyes]


Michelle said...

dude...they still do the flying pig! Amazing.

Mala said...

Mtnmama - yeah, well, 'ballsy' - I was shaking for an hour after landing.

Lori - *palm to forehead* I should have asked John for lessons. He has skill AND YOUTH on his side. Seriously, my instructor's constant tremors were a little nerve-wracking.

STUART! STUART!!!! OMG is it really you?! AWESOME!

Michelle - yes, they do. and it was awesome. I saw Roger Waters a few years ago at an open air venue and I watch the gigantic pig literally sail off into the sunset. I was trying to picture how many accidents on the I495 that the sight of a flying pig would cause. Oh and what goes up must come down... imagine waking up to find that in your backyard.

Michelle said...

I would go back to bed...or make bacon for breakfast.mmmmmm...bacon.

Mala said...

Michelle - and that's why you are awesome!